This is the second part of my three-part series on getting back into board gaming after a long absence. In Part One, I looked at ways to rebuild your gaming muscles. (If you want to skip ahead, you can go to Part Three (Coming Soon!) to read about the games that brought me back into gaming.) As with any hobby, a long time away can result in skill loss. Your ability to strategize and quickly learn rules can atrophy. The good news is, it’s pretty easy to get those skills back with a little practice.
What’s not as easy to regain is a lost group of board gaming buddies. My five-year layoff from gaming began with Covid and continued through a cascading series of family issues. By the time everything was somewhat back to normal, I’d lost all of my gamer friends. Covid destroyed my gaming groups, and caregiving for my parents left no time for games. When I looked around several years later, all of my gaming friends had moved on, either to new places, new hobbies, or new responsibilities.
Not being an extrovert, it’s not easy for me to find new people to play with. However, I know that if I want to keep board gaming as a hobby, I have to gather my courage and get out there. I’m working on it, but it’s slow going. I still don’t have as many friends as I once did, and the core group I do have is much smaller. But it’s far better than nothing, and I have been successful at finding various ways to meet new people and rebuild my gaming tribe. (I’ve also discovered some fun new things, like music bingo.) Here are six tips to help you get out there and find new gaming buddies if you find yourself adrift someday.
1. Go to meetups.
By far, this is the easiest, most accessible way to meet new gamer friends. Most cities have some sort of group(s) available. They may meet at libraries, coffee shops, game stores, churches, senior centers, community centers, or other public spaces. A quick internet search will tell you where to find most of them, or you can look on Meetup.com. Fellow users of BoardGameGeek are also a good resource for finding groups. Local word of mouth is also helpful. Put the word out that you’re looking for a game group and someone may connect you with their neighbor or coworker who’s into games.
2. Start your own game group
If your area doesn’t have any groups, start your own. Ask at places like your local library, game shop, or community center for permission to host at their location. Many have dedicated spaces that you can use for free, or rent for a nominal fee. Some coffee shops, bars, or restaurants will let you play there, particularly if people are buying food and drinks. If your neighborhood offers a gathering space like a pool house, that can work, too. Post your group on Meetup.com, or ask the hosting space to let you advertise there. Pass the word among your friends and coworkers. If a traditional group doesn’t work, try creating a silent game club.
3. Revitalize an old game group.
While it may seem that an old game group is truly dead, that may not be the case. Don’t assume that your old friends can no longer game with you. While they may have stopped gaming a few years ago, they might be in a different place now and may be seeking to start anew. Don’t be afraid to make the first move and ask. The worst they’ll say is, “No,” and you won’t be any worse off. But they may miss you, too, and want to reconnect.
4. Go off the beaten path.
Sometimes it can be easier to find groups for things like role-playing games, chess, or mahjong (seems to be a current craze) than for traditional tabletop games. That’s fine. Join those and try them out. People are often multi-faceted, and you might find that there are people there who also like regular board games. You can spin off a new group if that’s the case, or they may be able to direct you to a good group.
This has been the single best way that I’ve been able to get back to gaming regularly. I found a local mahjong group that looked like a fun group of people. I didn’t know much about the game beyond the solitaire version on my phone, but I learned. After we’d been playing for a few weeks, I brought my copy of Dragon Castle and convinced them to try it. They liked it, and I’ve been able to convince them to try some other tile-placement and card games. We’re all growing a bit. I’m getting better at mahjong and they’re trying some new games. It’s a win for all.
5. Go to conventions, even small ones.
Yeah, it’d be great if we could all afford to go to Gen Con or Essen SPIEL, but many cities offer smaller board game conventions that are easily accessible. They’re often sponsored by local shops, community organizations, or game groups. They may be small, but they attract like-minded people and offer you a chance to meet some new gamer friends. The best thing about these small conventions is that most attendees are local, so anyone you meet and connect with can easily join you for games.
6. Play party games.
Hear me out before dismissing this idea. There are a lot of groups around that get together to play things like music bingo, bar trivia, poker/traditional card games, Bunco, or other party games. These groups are populated with people who like to get together and have fun playing games. It may not be a far stretch to introduce a few of them to board games (or they may already like board games and play party games for extra fun). At the very least, you’ll get to have some laughs and enjoy playing something with people.
My Best Advice
Be flexible and open, both in terms of what you will play and the people you want to meet. Cast a wide net. You may have to compromise on your favorite games, at least in the beginning. You may not be able to find people who will play your heavy euro games, but you might find a group willing to play lighter games. Hardcore board gamers might not be available, but you might find some RPG players who are willing to try your games. Just get out there and meet people and see where it leads. Even if you don’t wind up with a board game group, you may still wind up with a group of fun people to do other things with.
